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Digla se halabuka oko dozvole britanskog parlamenta za “dizajniranje” beba i što više o tome posljednjih dana čitam, sve sam tome sklonija. Pa zamislite da moj mali sad ima dvije mame plus tatu.
- Alooo, gospođo donorice, molim vas lijepo, danas vi otiđite na primanje roditelja, ja sam već umorna od udaraca u pleksus, a razrednici uostalom treba nešto smuljati zašto nije bio u školi. Hvala vam unaprijed.
- A zašto nije bio u školi, moliću?
- Zato šta je lijen.
- Na koga je lijen? Na mene nije, ja sam O.K.! Uostalom, mali je moj samo jedan posto.
- Ima bit da je na jednoga pradidu za kojega kažu da je u selu bija poznat ka pučki pisnik i linčina... Ima nešto i ćaćina u sebi, šta ćemo, draga donorice, sve smo uredile osim toga. Puca od zdravlja, fala van lipa, ali eto, malo je udren u mišiće...
Kad neko dijete uspije, onda je nalik materi i ocu. Frka je kad ne uspije.
- Bogati, na koga je ovi mali?
- Na ludoga ti brata, eto na koga.
- Ma je li? Isti je isticijani ona tvoja munjena sestra...
Ozbiljno mislim da nema velikoga zla od pokušaja da se naprave bolji ljudi, jer duboko vjerujem da su u genetskom materijalu današnje mladosti, osim predaka, sudjelovale kokoši, grdobine i razni aditivi, a o mobitelima da i ne govorim.
Pa pogledajte im samo brojeve postola!Ona gomila nabildane piletine i GMO pahuljica koju su smazali kroz život pretvorila ih je u dlakava čudovišta Guliverovih stopala i liliputanskoga mozga. Najrazvijeniji dio njihovih tijela su palčevi kojima šalju SMS-ove, MMS-ove, klikaju lajkove... Pa šta mi roditelji imamo s tim? Nismo li i mi naknadno dizajnirani izvana? Znanost i napredak nas kvari, neka nas sad i popravlja!
Evo, kad bi ja, zamislimo, mogla birat donoricu gena za neko buduće dijete, najprije bi joj izračunala voljni momenat.
- Ustajete li ujutro lako iz postelje? Ostavljate li prljave bičve pored kreveta? Jeste li, molim vas lijepo, čitali lektiru? Možete li zadržati pažnju na nekom tekstu dulje od minute? Nabrojite sastavne veznike!
- A e i o u!
- Pali ste, žalim, sljedeća!
Mislite da ovo s veznicima nije bitno? Kad vam jedan srednjoškolac kao iz topa umjesto pravog odgovora izvali samoglasnike, počnete se ozbiljno preispitivat gdje se zapetljalo s vama i s njim. I stvarno, na koga li je, majke ti?A da bar ima dvije matere, jedna bi lijepo s njim udrila gramatiku, druga matematiku, otac bi uskakao za povijest... I kupio šporke bičve s poda.
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Digla se halabuka oko dozvole britanskog parlamenta za “dizajniranje” beba i što više o tome posljednjih dana čitam, sve sam tome sklonija. Pa zamislite da moj mali sad ima dvije mame plus tatu.
- Alooo, gospođo donorice, molim vas lijepo, danas vi otiđite na primanje roditelja, ja sam već umorna od udaraca u pleksus, a razrednici uostalom treba nešto smuljati zašto nije bio u školi. Hvala vam unaprijed.
- A zašto nije bio u školi, moliću?
- Zato šta je lijen.
- Na koga je lijen? Na mene nije, ja sam O.K.! Uostalom, mali je moj samo jedan posto.
- Ima bit da je na jednoga pradidu za kojega kažu da je u selu bija poznat ka pučki pisnik i linčina... Ima nešto i ćaćina u sebi, šta ćemo, draga donorice, sve smo uredile osim toga. Puca od zdravlja, fala van lipa, ali eto, malo je udren u mišiće...
Kad neko dijete uspije, onda je nalik materi i ocu. Frka je kad ne uspije.
- Bogati, na koga je ovi mali?
- Na ludoga ti brata, eto na koga.
- Ma je li? Isti je isticijani ona tvoja munjena sestra...
Ozbiljno mislim da nema velikoga zla od pokušaja da se naprave bolji ljudi, jer duboko vjerujem da su u genetskom materijalu današnje mladosti, osim predaka, sudjelovale kokoši, grdobine i razni aditivi, a o mobitelima da i ne govorim.
Pa pogledajte im samo brojeve postola!Ona gomila nabildane piletine i GMO pahuljica koju su smazali kroz život pretvorila ih je u dlakava čudovišta Guliverovih stopala i liliputanskoga mozga. Najrazvijeniji dio njihovih tijela su palčevi kojima šalju SMS-ove, MMS-ove, klikaju lajkove... Pa šta mi roditelji imamo s tim? Nismo li i mi naknadno dizajnirani izvana? Znanost i napredak nas kvari, neka nas sad i popravlja!
Evo, kad bi ja, zamislimo, mogla birat donoricu gena za neko buduće dijete, najprije bi joj izračunala voljni momenat.
- Ustajete li ujutro lako iz postelje? Ostavljate li prljave bičve pored kreveta? Jeste li, molim vas lijepo, čitali lektiru? Možete li zadržati pažnju na nekom tekstu dulje od minute? Nabrojite sastavne veznike!
- A e i o u!
- Pali ste, žalim, sljedeća!
Mislite da ovo s veznicima nije bitno? Kad vam jedan srednjoškolac kao iz topa umjesto pravog odgovora izvali samoglasnike, počnete se ozbiljno preispitivat gdje se zapetljalo s vama i s njim. I stvarno, na koga li je, majke ti?A da bar ima dvije matere, jedna bi lijepo s njim udrila gramatiku, druga matematiku, otac bi uskakao za povijest... I kupio šporke bičve s poda.
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12. svibanj 2024 20:36
